Regret

What truly is 'regret'?

That time when you missed your favourite dance recital because you decided your family could use you around?

OR

That pair of one of a kind Blahnik you missed because you were planning to pay for your beloved's Valentine's gift?

Is it justified to say that we regret when we could have gone back in time and change some things in our past? Or is 'regret' a term for self consolation? What does regretting truly entail?

I for one have my own specifically designed take on the idea. For me, regret is when some misjudgment, in the past has got repercussions in the present. And when the repercussions become ceaseless, recurring at every path you take and at every corner you turn, a pang of anguish manifests. Regret.

I regret but one thing in life, falling in love with the wrong person unattainable person.

When your life seems to still be effected by that one moment when you surrendered, you regret.

But then again, I have also realised that try as might, I would never be able to shake off the feeling that I am inadequate in so many other aspects of my life that could have been better have I been stronger. Not that I am passing over my own achievements but to know that capabilities are somewhat restrained by mere redundancies I stop to think that maybe regret is the only way I can sum things up. Self consolation perhaps?

Would I go back in time and change it? Even I cannot seem to find an answer for that. True; to suffer a physical wound is far more palatable than to survive a broken heart. Not all of us get second chances and the foresight to see how the 'yes' and the 'no' may unfold (speaking solely on clairvoyant abilities) and we never (at least in the realms of logic and science) get a 'do-over' because there is no turning back time. Even if it does exist, our memories and experiences are only as good as the moment they get, voluntarily or involuntarily, deleted. Still the answer seems like an enigma; I am clueless if I would've been just as pleased with my life 'if'.

Regret.

So far, only one in my life.

I have reasoned every other miss.

Sometimes it's just best to left the unanswered, unanswered.

Indifference and ignorance are, in this case our best bet because......

Who would ever know 'if'?

Trying to decipher it would leave us back where we started.