When I Said That Character Won't Be Seeing Its Last Post....

How such a passing thought becomes true. I met Mr. P again, after exactly 2 years and 2 weeks.

Last I met him, it was his sister's wedding. I didn't attend his mom's funeral. And that was the end...

And just hours ago I was there, sitting in his living room like it was 2009 all over again. 

I went there because I felt, the very least, his dad needed some sort of comforting. Losing a child is the stuff of nightmares. I was also helping Confused Gal and her sister out because they couldn't find a bus out of that remote place.

I didn't actually have a proper conversation with him. There wasn't much to say between us. But he did make an effort to talk to me. He teased my weight gain as I walked in the door and while eating as I was kinda forced to have dinner.

Mr. P : Have some more rice J.

Me : Enough, that's enough for me.

Mr. P : Why? What you on a diet or something? *wide smiles*

Me : *raised eyebrows and smiles*

I noticed that he kept looking at me. I was too afraid to look right at him because when someone just looks at me, I look them back straight in the eye. I am not in love with someone else. And even if I were, a relationship like the one I had with Mr. P doesn't just erase itself. I did catch a glimpse of him and we stared dead straight into each others' eyes for 2 whole seconds. I knew he wanted to make conversation but I just wouldn't look his way. For the most part I was sitting on a one seat couch beside which was a separate 2 seats couch. And for the better part of the night, he was sitting on that two seats couch edged near me. He managed to tell me about how the accident happened and the mystery surrounding it, details of which I am trying to erase myself. 

And then I left, with Confused Gal and her sister.

Later I sent them off on their way and I came and sat down in the car.

I need a Mr. P detox. 

That's what it feels like right now.

But I know, come tomorrow, I'll be just fine...

Now I Pity Mr. P...

Just about a year and a half ago Mrs. GE's time on Earth came to an end.

Just over 24 hours ago, her youngest followed suit.

I got the news yesterday morning.

Crazy Soldier was the bearer.

The boy was 23.

Was just confirmed to receive his diploma and graduation was supposedly around the corner.

Apparently his motorcycle skidded right into a wall.

The one invariable scenario I got from all the stories I heard was that the fella suffered a head injury which lead to his death on the spot.

Now I feel bad for the guy.

Not the brother, I feel bad for Mr. P...

He's already messed up, 'up there' *gestures to the head i.e. the brains*.

This is the last thing he needs; another loved one leaving him.

I kinda started the string of his loved ones (arguable, but I'd like to think I was one of them) leaving him.

Intentionally or otherwise.

First me,

Then Confused Gal followed (yes, it has been over a year since they've been separated).

Then the mother, Mrs. GE.

Now his brother.

I offer my solemn prayer to God.

For his brother's Soul.

Dear God,

Take this soul, this child of yours, into your merciful arms.

Offer him comfort and solace.

Take his pain away.

Console him and then as per the laws of karma,

Move him on or give him salvation.

I pray for his salvation.

Aum Shanthi.

In my vivid memory, 

Jayaselan, 1991 - 2014.

The Paternal Granny; Madam K.....

..... has been reduced from the iron lady having raised 6 children, to a feeble, senile, incontinent old lady who seems to be spending her days waiting for Yama (I hate to say it but it's true).

She can hardly walk up a flight of stairs.

She can control neither her bladder nor her bowels.

She has become so weak that she moves around only twice a day (to the dining area, once for lunch and once for dinner; breakfast is usually sent to her room).

Her sense of direction and her sense of movement have grossly deteriorated.

Saddest of it all is the lack of interest my dad's siblings have about her status quo except the one she lives with at the moment (Aunt #4). I guess The High Priest and Aunt #3 are the other two exceptions because The High Priest is probably the only sibling closely involved in her welfare whilst Aunt #3 is not only living in a different state but is also ailing herself (besides, she sends money from time to time for her mother).

Of course Aunt #4 is doing a pretty decent job of taking care of her mother. But The High Priestess begs to differ, divulging to me that Aunt #4 should be doing a better job at taking care of Madam K, who is after all Aunt #4's own mother. I guess that speaks volumes of The High Priestess as she feels so badly for her Madam K although Madam K has been very difficult to her in the past (think Tamil soap drama mother-in-law vs daughter-in-law drama).

I am praying that God either restores her to a walking and talking state or, the very least, makes her 'transition' a smooth, painless and peaceful one.

She has suffered enough.

Aum Shanthi.

The Bad Guy from Mahabaratham

Nope this post isn't so much about the Hindu epic story.

It is more about the actor that plays Duryodhana a.k.a The Bad Guy in the latest re-telling of the Hindu epic via a TV-series.

The series itself has managed to stay true to story-telling but has pushed beyond lavishness with the sets, costumes and casting.

Everyone in it is freaking "cantik". I mean every actor!!!

For example;

Saurabh Raj Jain as Krishna
Courtesy of Times of India and India Forums

Shaheer Sheikh as Arjunan
Courtesy of Bolega India and India Forums

EVEN THE ACTRESSES!!! 

Pooja Sharma as Draupadi
Courtesy of Santa Banta and Sulekha.com 

That is one gorgeous woman!
Isn't she?


But the one whom stole my heart?
Arpit Ranka as Duryodhana
The antagonist.
I like the bad guy; big surprise *eye roll*.

Courtesy of Chennai Online

Courtesy of India Forums

*meltsssssssssss*

Isn't he pretty??????

*long deep breathing sighs*

Crippled!

Literally!
Sustained a knee injury!

Fell into the drain a week prior to the actual incident.
Must have damaged the knee to some degree then.

Was forced to dance during a relative's wedding function.

Just on the open dance floor, not a performance.

2 minutes in, I landed my leg the wrong way.

Felt like my knees were gonna fall apart.

I knew something went horribly wrong.
I prayed that it was not a dislocation of the joint.

Was scared more than I was in pain.

Odissi flashed before my eyes and how training would be affected.

This happened about two months ago.

Recovery period for meniscus injury is longer.

As opposed to bone injury where keeping in motion is encouraged.

Meniscus injury require complete rest during its initial stages.

No strenuous activity until it fully recovers.

Which could take months.

Have put on some weight.

And now am in a quest to loose it.

Wish me both luck and a speedy recovery.

Odissi Dancers from....

Russia!

Yes, RUSSIA!!!

They are Elena Knyazava and Irina Komissarova

And here they perform an abhinaya piece.

A piece depicting Ardhaniswara; a form of Lord Shiva.

Half the God Shiva (the male aspect) and the other half the Goddess Shakti (the female energy).

This as good as any of the best odissi dancers in the world!

PS: This is the LINK to the video on Youtube. Another thing is that the entire piece actually lasts much longer; around 15 minutes. The dancers have apparently shortened it for the performance.

It's Done!

And it's my thesis!

It's done!

I am so relieved!

I Need...

Someone/something to drag me out of this!!!

Image courtesy of DV

This my absolute downfall!

I Miss My Former Alma Mater

Drove dad down to the capital of the country yesterday.

And realised how much of my life happened there.

The large mall so close to the former alma mater.

The public transportation I so often boarded.

The places I have actually walked through.

That warmth of being back home.

Yet it felt a little foreign.

Unfamiliar even...

I miss it.

All of it...

The Ghunghroos I Have Been Waiting For...

My endless optimistic babbles about Indian classical dance is mercilessly taunting my cynicism, threatening to corrode sarcasm and wit (or whatever semblance of it that I had).

After my first performance with TDS (the Indian performing arts institution I am currently affiliated with shall be named The Dance School TDS hereafter), I became obsessed with ghungroos because I knew the dancing bells presented to me were not the real deal.

Only last year we received original dance accessories, and this year news came to me that we would be getting (FINALLY) the proper odissi ghungroos. 

Image courtesy of http://odissidanceworld.com/

However even after paying for it, the ordeal of waiting for it did not end. 

Receiving news that it had arrived and I when I realised I was far from receiving them was too painful a realisation!

After months, yesterday I went back to TDS to attend the odissi performance for Navarathri this year (which I would have been part of if not for my stupid MSc thesis). 

And my teacher blessed me and finally (after MONTHS!!!!) handed me my very own GHUNGROOS!!!!!!!!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Inch after inch, I admired them, to the point of inspecting each individual bell removing a few stray pieces of brass metal. 

And took many many pictures!

On my ankles.

A comparison with the bells I strung myself.

Notice the difference in size. The original ones (right) are made out of thicker brass.

A comparison to the ones I received on my maiden odissi performance with TDS.

It's like my own happy family!

And of course the star of this post!

Its arrival has given me a joy as intense as the time I first performed with TDS and the joy of receiving my very own odissi accessories.

I feel complete.