So often

 I have to talk myself off the ledge.

All the time.

I would never jump because I am too scared.

I hope there comes a time in my life when ledge is a little further away.

Because it has been very close the past couple of years.

I've learn to deal but alas it is isn't ideal to say the least.

But all so I don't jump.

I won't.

But the ledge is near.